• 2026

    March Release Spotlight

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    Demolicious Derby 2026, Vol. I: Ten of the Best Hardcore Demos of the Year So Far

  • 2026

    February Release Spotlight

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    Album Review: Slaughterday – “Dread Emperor” (Death Metal)

  • 2026

    January Release Spotlight

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    Track Premiere: Ashenheart – “Stars Wept to the Sea”

  • 2026

    Album Review: Malignant Aura – “Where All of Worth Comes to Wither” (Death/Doom)

  • 2026

    Album Review: Eximperitus – “Meritoriousness of Equanimity” (Technical/Brutal Death)

  • 2025

    Kep’s Best Albums of 2025

  • 2025

    Kep’s Best EPs of 2025

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2026

February Release Spotlight

March 2, 2026 Noob Heavy admin

Another month down, another fresh set of horrors, another bunch of killer metal and metal-adjacent albums to help keep us sane. We’ve rounded up the February releases we think are most worthy of the spotlight, […]

2025

Kep’s Best Albums of 2025

December 31, 2025 Noob Heavy admin

Happy New Year, folks. It’s still before midnight here in Pacific Standard Time (aka the only time zone that matters) so legally speaking I’ve managed to fire this off while it’s still 2025. I listened […]

2025

Kep’s Best EPs of 2025

December 24, 2025 Noob Heavy admin

Written by Kep Welcome in for the first of my two AOTY articles. Today we’re talking EPs, and 2025 was full of great ones. I rounded up 13 that I thought were particularly deserving of […]

2025

Halloween Bloodbath: 6(66) All Hallows Releases You Need to Hear

October 29, 2025 Noob Heavy admin

Written by Kep Metal and Halloween go together like blood and guts. In fact, there’s usually a flood of metal releases on 10/31 even when it falls on a non-standard release day, just because so […]

2025

Noob Heavy’s 2025 Mid-year Best Albums

July 6, 2025 Noob Heavy admin

Welcome to July 2025, folks. Shit’s, uh, shit’s tough out there. We get it. But the music is good, and we writing staff got our heads together and decided on a special feature to mark […]

2025

Album Review: Lipoma – “No Cure for the Sick” (Goregrind/Melodic Death)

June 12, 2025 Noob Heavy admin

Written by Kep Lipoma – No Cure for the Sick> Goregrind/melodic death metal> California, US> Releasing June 13> Gurgling Gore Look, I wasn’t born yesterday. If I see a release from the filthmongers at Gurgling Gore, and […]

2025

Album Review: Thus Spoke Zarathustra – “I’m Done With Self Care, It’s Time for Others’ Harm” (Deathcore)

May 19, 2025 Ellis Heasley

Thus Spoke Zarathustra – I’m Done With Self Care, It’s Time for Others’ Harm> Deathcore> Maryland, US> Releasing May 23> Prosthetic Records Deathcore is so back right now isn’t it? Like proper deathcore that is, […]

2025

The Best Things We Heard in April

May 1, 2025 Noob Heavy admin

Another month of 2025 is in the rearview mirror, and it featured some ass-kickers. No big preamble today: let’s dig into Noob Heavy’s favorite listens of the month! As always, albums we reviewed in full […]

2025

The Best Things We Heard in January

February 4, 2025 Noob Heavy admin

Written by Kep, Kirk, and Ellis It’s a new year, and with the new year we’ve got a new monthly article for you, dear reader. Each month some of our writers will each choose an […]

2024

Westin’s Top Albums of 2024

January 3, 2025 Westin

Written by Westin 2024 has been a year. Dealt with an overwhelmingly strong identity crisis, a serious burnout from that crisis resulting in a scant handful of full reviews from me, and got a new […]

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