Album Review: Conan – “Violence Dimension” (Doom/Sludge/Stoner)

Written by Kirk

(The scene opens in the middle of a large tent in Birmingham, England. Seated at the head of a long table is Black Sabbath, who are joined by the leading doom metal bands from all across the globe. All along the table are tall candelabras adorned with black candles burning just brightly enough to illuminate the faces of the band members gathered around the table. There is a low, somber murmur amongst those gathered together, creating an almost drone-like hum until Tony Iommi raises his fist into the air, causing a hush to fall. Slowly, he stands up to address the attendees.)

TONY IOMMI:
“We have gathered you all here to discuss something of great import.  …Candlemass, what is best in life?”

JOHAN LÄNGQVIST:
(strokes his goatee in deep thought, then smiles)
“The open road, free verse, a roadie in your midst, and the stage fans in your hair.”

TONY IOMMI:
(slams his fist on the table)
“WRONG!!  Conan, what is best in life?”

JON DAVIS:
“To crush your audience, to see them headbang before you, and to hear the lamentation of the sound crew.”

(everyone cheers)

TONY IOMMI:
“Yes, that is good.”

Between you and me, if anything even remotely close to what I just wrote were to actually happen in real life, I would die. Whether that death would be my heart suddenly stopping from the sheer magnitude of such a momentous meeting of doom metal bands short circuiting my nervous system or spontaneous combustion from sheer excitement is neither here nor there, my (un)timely demise would be almost assured. By now, it should be no surprise that I love doom metal…like, A LOT. So it should equally be no surprise that I literally squealed when a promo for Conan’s new album, Violence Dimension, landed in the Noob Heavy inbox. 2025 is starting to look up!

Now, before I start digging into this latest record, I should start off by saying, “I love Conan.”  I first discovered them while perusing Roadburn Records’ Bandcamp page and ravenously devouring every single live performance album my two ears could handle (which, I’m sure you can imagine, is a lot), and Mount Wrath: Live at Roadburn 2012 remains amongst my favorites. There’s something about those painfully slow and oppressively heavy riffs that bring my cold, shriveled heart so much joy. They’re also responsible for one of the greatest album titles ever imagined with 2018’s Existential Void Guardian.  But I would be remiss in not falling upon my own Conan Sword to admit that these are the only official Conan releases I’ve listened to; what I have listened to outside of the aforementioned releases has been various songs culled from their other releases prior to 2018. So while I have not fully immersed myself in the Conan lexicon, I am by no means a neophyte, either.

Be that as it may, I feel that I am well within my rights as one of Noob Heavy’s leading Doom Metal Enjoyers™️ to weigh in on Violence Dimension. In short, if you’re expecting this new Conan record to sound exactly like a Conan record, you won’t be disappointed.  While a fairly predictable band in terms of how their songs sound and feel, they are about as consistent as a Red Hot Chili Peppers song being about the state of California (i.e.: extremely consistent). And they are very much at home with new label Heavy Psych Sounds, one of the world’s leading doom and stoner metal record labels. But what is it about Violence Dimension that makes it such a powerhouse of an album? I’m so glad you asked!

Opening track “Foeman’s Flesh” is about as heavy as they come. With the subtlety of a spiked war hammer to the back of your skull, it somehow manages to both pummel you senseless while also lulling you into an almost trancelike state with its hypnotic rhythm. After several listens, I couldn’t tell if my headache was from the band banging their instruments or me banging my head (both of which are extremely likely). The pace begins to quicken throughout the course of “Desolation Hexx”, which starts off as a doom song and slowly builds into a sludge song.  Then “Total Bicep” steps in and says, “Nope, all sludge all the way,” giving way to the total track that takes us back to another pounding, hypnotic doom song. This cycle repeats as “Frozen Edges of the Wound” quickens the pace again and gives way to “Warpsword”, which is probably the fastest (and shortest) song in the record, bringing Conan dangerously close to thrash metal territory. Closing out the album are the slow & heavy “Ocean of Boiling Skin” and the almost drone-like “Vortexxion”, which is by far the slowest song of the whole bunch; they channel their inner SUNN O))) to briefly become CO)))NAN.

THE BOTTOM LINE

Sometimes listening to a new album from a band you love and hearing exactly what you expect is everything you need. That sense of comfort is like a nice warm blanket on a cold, rainy day or snuggling up with your pet. Yes, it’s true that I’m a weirdo and often crave strange new sounds that can make the casual music enjoyer run screaming for their carefully curated playlists, but I, too, have records that I occasionally feel the need to revisit from time to time. So when a band like Conan puts out a great record like Violence Dimension that sounds exactly like I want it to sound, there’s a small part of me that thinks maybe—just maybe—this album was meant for me. And whether or not that’s actually the case doesn’t matter; it brings joy, comfort, and pleasure, and I honestly can’t think of a better reason to listen. Like, at all.