
Year’s End With Melinda
Written by Melinda (18+ only) Melinda here, been laying low a couple months but I was merely studying the sword and now I’m back on my bullshit. If you’re new here, I run this website, I’m trans and I say stupid shit about sub genres a lot. In fact I even do that thing hardcore…

Noob’s Policy On AI Art Submissions: No Thank You
Written by Melinda (Carcassbomb) Recently in conversation with the great folks at Toilet Ov Hell the topic of album submissions that use AI generated artwork came up and whether or not that should be something metal blogs should be supporting or not. Between us all we came to the conclusion that is sucks and we…

Roundup: November Notables
Written by Kep, Melinda, Westin, and Greg Schwan We’re getting there, folks: this extremely silly year is almost over. I have a feeling that this will be the last monthly roundup of 2022, as December releases are usually pretty light, and it’s coming up on AOTY list time here at Noob Heavy. So without further…

Album Review: Mykki Blanco – “Stay Close to Music” (Rap/Pop)
Written by Melinda (Who deleted her Twitter account but is active in the Noob Discord) Mykki Blanco – Stay Close to Music> Rap/pop> California, US> Released October 14> Transgressive Records Your feminism is not my feminism unless it includes all kinds of women Nourishing, this album is nourishing in so many ways. Mykki Blanco is…

Roundup: July Jams & Jigs
Written by Melinda, Kep, Westin, Barlovv & Ellis I don’t know what you expect me to say in this opening paragraph anymore. We all know how months work and we’re all here for the same thing: to quickly read about a dozen or so albums our writers thought was cool out of the absurd amount…

Roundup: June Jollies
Written by Melinda, Barlovv, Kep and Ellis Heasley A mix of fresh mini reviews mixed with excerpts from larger reviews the team did of June releases. Underground metal and hardcore big and small. Pick and choose, or just shuffle this play list and let the jolly of June surprise you. But be sure to listen…

Melinda’s Mid Year Selections
We made it to the halfway point of another fucked up year, woo. For those who enjoy these kinds of lists, here’s the coolest shit I (Melinda aka Carcassbomb) has heard this year. 20 albums, so strap in (this article has undergone 53 revisions, I have a problem). As per my usual curation, expect a…

Roundup: May Macrodose
A big bag of albums we’ve been listening to that came out in May. Albums picked by Kep, Barlovv, Ellis and Melinda. Below is the Noob Heavy 2022 release radar for metal and hardcore, for those looking to catch up. Cave In – Heavy Pendulum Posthardcore from Boston, USARelapse Records The much anticipated return album…

Album Review: Lunar Blood – “Twilight Insurgency” (RABM/Death)
Written by Melinda >Lunar Blood – Twilight Insurgency> Red & Anarchist black metal/death metal>New Jersey, USA>Released February 18, 2022>Bandcamp Link “Killing us under cover of law all this violence takes its toll we’ll arm ourselves. Bars and clubs turn to armories new black coffins for old white men” Absolutely uncompromising antifascist blackened death metal from…

Roundup: April Assortments & Atrocities
Another month and yet another roundup article, I’m actually sticking to this one! The scribes this month are Kep, April, Ellis and Melinda (thats me, I don’t have twitter anymore and IG banned me for having 1312 in my @ so I use Discord: Melinda#5425). Some exciting picks this month from familiar bands and a…

Album Review: A Pale December – “Death Panacea” (Black Metal)
Written by Melinda A Pale December – Death PanaceaAtmospheric black metal from ItalyLabel: Avantgarde Music Black metal is a funny little genre filled with shrieks and snarls and tremolo picking and blast beats and tones drowned in distortion used to make a forceful hateful kind of tune, and yet if you arrange these elements incorrectly…

EP Review: Hanging Garden – “Neither Moth nor Rust” (Doom/Gothic)
Written by Melinda Hanging Garden – Neither Moth nor RustDoom/Prog/Gothic metal from Finland A pretty EP from long-running Finish band Hanging Garden who play very melancholic doomy music with lots of traditional and progressive flair such as piano interludes and tracks that sound like a euro take on Cynic with the robotic vocal effects and…

Mel’s Big Bong Of Bangers
Written by Melinda I don’t usually write when I’m stoned but I can’t see any other way of reviewing this many 2022 stoner doom/rock albums. Iced coffee, Gatorade and other kind of improvised bottle bongs only please, no bourgeoisie stoner shit on my watch. If you want more tunes, check out our stoner playlist of…

Album Review: Wraithstorm – “Unseen & Unfound” (Funeral Death Doom)
Written by Melinda Wraithstorm – Unseen & UnfoundFuneral death doom from USAReleased April 1, 2022 Get comfortable, we’re talking funeral doom here. Besides being a genre that gets too few releases each month in comparison to most other genres, this project is also the creation of trans and nonbinary musicians, so you can bet I…

Album Review: Author & Punisher – “KRÜLLER” (Industrialgaze)
Written by Melinda Author & Punisher – KRÜLLERIndustrial, drone, doomReleased February 11, 2022 In theory I’m supposed to listen to many new albums every week or even every day as a hobby music journalist but every now and then I’ll go a long time without listening to much because I find myself craving a specific…

Album Review: Cult Of Luna – “The Long Road North” (Post Metal)
Written by Melinda This is a long running and consistently high quality band that has an impressive output rate, the result of which will either have you thoroughly impressed or completely indifferent but I do not believe it is possible to call this bad by any stretch. For many there simply is not enough re-invention…

Noob Heavy’s January Jams
Written by Melinda, Kep, Espi Kvlt, Zax and Valky We used to do a weekly roundup but it’s so hard to get going in the new year, who wants to pay attention to anything during January? Welcome to the monthly roundup which includes many new mini reviews from the team as well as highlighting some…

Melinda’s Top 69 Albums of 2021
Melinda Hey, when you’re done with my list below or even just open these in a tab now, I’ve conveniently listed all of our contributor end of year articles from all the cool people I invited to share their picks. And also my other list for Toilet Ov Hell Free Flush of course (which has…

Last Friday This Week: December 3rd 2021 Release Day
Written by Melinda, Kep, John Angel and Crisy The year is coming to a close and yet the quality of music is far from on the decline with some huge albums last week to catch up on. If you need to catch up on the whole ass year, then take a gander at our massive…

Last Friday This Week: 19th November Release Day
Written by Melinda, Espi Kvlt, Kep, Ellis & Valky Big release week (last week), we had some big albums like Converge & Chelsea Wolfe which Melinda covered in full, and also Swallow The Sun which she will surely cover soon. Why is she talking about herself in the third person? Well, below are release day…

Album Review: Trophy Scars – “Astral Pariah” (Post Hardcore)
Written by Melinda Trophy scars – Astral PariahPost Hardcore/Progressive blues from New Jersey, USAReleased September 10, 2021 I am the blanket of death between the moon and the stars One of my all time favourite post hardcore bands are still going strong with their new progressive blues style of very-post-hardcore that I have enjoyed watching…

Album Review: Converge & Chelsea Wolfe – Bloodmoon: I (Post hardcore/Doomgaze)
Written by Melinda Converge & Chelsea Wolfe – Bloodmoon: IPost hardcore/doomgaze/voidgaze from Massachusetts USAReleased November 19, 2021 A constant reminder, that our failures last forever A bit of a different direction that may not suit some fans, seems to have impressed most, but is certainly an album that feels like it was made just for…

Album Review: Blind Equation – “Life Is Pain” (Cybergrind)
Written by Melinda Blind Equation – Life Is PainEmotional cybergrind from Illinois, USAReleased September 3, 2021Independent (Name Your Own Price) I would rather die than think like you. Another dull blade stuck in the sands of time. Emotional cybergrind. That’s the review. But I’ll continue for those who enjoy reading and maybe don’t know what…

Album Review: King Woman – “Celestial Blues” (Doom)
Written by Melinda King Woman – Celestial BluesDoom rock from California, USAReleased July 30th 2021 via Relapse Records You’re like an empty cup. You always need somebody to fill you up. King Woman. One of those names you’ve likely heard this year, I know I did, almost TOO much. I tend to avoid stuff people…

Please Sir, I Want Some Core Vol 3 (XXL Edition)
Written by Carcassbomb Alright you dumpy fucks, Ellis had to go take a piss and so now I’m taking over and overdoing it. Find the kind of hardcore you like and go listen to it. Some real barn burners (Or perhaps Bridge Burners, eh?) in this mix with a line of lyric for flavour text…

Album Review: Between The Buried And Me – “Colors II” 7/10 (Prog Metal)
Written by Carcassbomb (Don’t yell at me) Between The Buried And Me – Colors IIProgressive metalcore/RockReleased August 20, 2021 7/10 TRAPPED IN OUR GEOMETRIC NESTS OF NOT GIVING A FUCK In this review I will be asking the questions, “is it possible to listen an album too many times prior to review?” and “Is this…

Album Review: Filth Is Eternal – “Love Is a Lie, Filth Is Eternal” 8/10 (Hardcore)
Written by Carcassbomb Filth Is Eternal – Love Is A Lie, Filth Is EternalHardcore Punk from Seattle, WashingtonReleased August 27th, 20218/10 BODY CHAOS. BLOODY JAW. Some of you may have been familiar with the hardcore band Fucked & Bound and their belligerent floor pounding live shows. If you’ve wondered where they went to, they’ve rebranded…

Album Review: MouthBreather – “I’m Sorry Mr. Salesman” 9/10 (Hardcore)
Written by Carcassbomb MouthBreather – I’m Sorry Mr. SalesmanExperimental hardcore from Boston, USAReleased August 13th, 2021Via Good Fight Music9/10 CHAOS AROUND ME, CHAOS AROUND ME. Hardcore in recent times has become heavily centred around being constantly technical and memey. This new album from MouthBreather takes us back to the more barbaric style of “what if…

Album Review: Amenra – “De Doorn” 8.5/10 (Post Metal)
Written by Carcassbomb Amenra – De DoornPost Metal/Sludge/Hardcore from BelgiumReleased June 25th, 2021 via Relapse Records8.5/10 OPEN THIS FUCKING PIT UP… SLOWLY Amenra are a hardworking and prolific band from Belgium whose hard work constantly releasing music and playing shows since the 90s has landed them in the lap of none other than Relapse Records.…

Album Review: Nothing Noble – “Modern Dismay” 8/10 (Prog Metalcore)
Written by Carcassbomb Nothing Noble – Mordern DismayProgressive Metalcore from DenmarkReleased August 6th, 20218/10 Long time readers of Noob Heavy might be aware of my contempt for progressive metalcore, particularly as an Australian where the mainstream music scene is flooded with samey sounding bands in the genre. I have been so brutal towards progressive metalcore,…

Musician Spotlight: Cesspool Of Corruption (Tech Death)
As we near the precipice of the August 6th release of our debut album, Requiems of The Ignominious, we decided to take a moment to look back upon some of the seminal albums that helped shape us and our sound as we progressed along the way as musicians. Each of us has chosen an album…

Album Review: Mental Cavity – “Mass Rebel Infest” 8/10 (Death/Hardcore)
Written by Carcassbomb Mental Cavity – Mass Rebel InfestDeath/Hardcore crossover from NSW, AustraliaReleased June 25th, 2021Via Creator-Destructor Records8/10 Mental Cavity landed firmly on my radar in 2019 with Neuro Siege and whenever I hear their music I just want to be in a room full of people beating the shit out of each other. Like…

Album Review: Dungeon Serpent – “World Of Sorrows” 9/10 (Melodic Death)
Written by Carcassbomb Dungeon Serpent – World Of SorrowsMelodic Death Metal from CanadaReleased July 16th, 2021Via Nameless Grave Records9/10 Sometimes melodic death metal looks and sounds a lot like black metal but is far more awesome because it is death metal, one such album is the debut World Of Sorrow from Dungeon Serpent. This is…

Album Review: Mordkaul – “Dress Code: Blood” 7/10 (Melo Death)
Written by Carcassbomb Mordkaul – Dress Code: BloodMelodic Death from BelgiumReleased 29th January, 2021Via WormHoleDeath 7/10 I remember seeing this album title a while back on social media and I think a lot of people, including myself, had incorrect assumptions based on seeing “Dress Code: Blood”. It sounds like something I guess you’d expect from…

Album Review: Lower Automation – “Lower Automation” 8/10 (mathcore/noise)
Written by John Angel Lower Automation – Lower Automation Mathcore/noise from Chicago Releasing via Zegema Beach Records Releases July 12, 2021 8/10 I cover a lot of death metal and prog leaning music here at Noob Heavy and I bet some of y’all don’t know that I have a soft spot for the many ‘core bands.…

Album Review: Backxwash – “I LIE HERE BURIED WITH MY RINGS AND MY DRESSES” 10/10 (Rap/Industrial)
A powerful album from a powerful person. To summarise it as briefly as possible: it’s an assault on the establishment through a very current lens. On this new album I LIE HERE BURIED WITH MY RINGS AND MY DRESSES, Backxwash annihilates us with each track, taking on subject matter ranging from transphobia and ACAB to…

Halfway To The Fucking End (mid year list)
It’s that time of year and why can’t it just be over already? 2019 sucked, 2020 sucked and 2021 sucked. The only thing consistent throughout these years is that we got a lot of good music to pass the time.

Album Review: Violet Cold – “Empire Of Love” 9/10 (Blackgaze/RABM)
Written by Carcassbomb Violet Cold – Empire Of LovePost Metal/Red Anarchist Black Metal from AzerbaijanReleased for free May 7th, 20219/10 Let’s talk about an album that has ruffled a lot of piss-weak feathers in the black metal scene, for reasons you can probably guess, the latest from experimental creator Violet Cold. This isn’t just a…

Album Review: Non Serviam – “Le Cœur Bat” 8.2/10 (RABM)
How should we start the album? Let’s play for 25 minutes. What do we call it? Le Coeur Bat (Roughly “The Heart Beats” in english), hell yeah. They can suitably do most lengths and change the base of the album at will due to the fluid nature of the compositions, resembling the construction of electronic…

Noob Heavy Bandcamp Code Pack Massive Giveaway
We are now working on a new giveaway for June 2022. If you want to have your album included and can provide 50 – 100 download codes, get in touch at teamnoobheavy@gmail.com – we’d greatly appreciate your help in keeping the site going with the same tools and reach. All packs for the below content…

Album Review: Victory Over the Sun – “Nowherer” 8.7/10 (Experimental Death)
This is something else. Victory Over the Sun is a solo project of a music genius named Vivian and she accomplishes a lot with this release. I won’t be able to do it justice, due to this person having an understanding of guitar and songwriting that I just do not possess, there are dimensions I…

Album Review: Dr Colossus – “I’m a Stupid Moron With an Ugly Face and A Big Butt and my Butt Smells and I Like to Kiss My Own Butt” 9/10 (Stoner Doom)
This is a big one for me, Dr Colossus have been my favorite Australian band since flooring me with The Dank in 2018. They combined good old Aussie stoner rock and stories told using The Simpsons. Fans of the show will have unlimited fun picking apart the references, I know I did with The Dank…

Album Review: Tommy Concrete – “Hexenzirkel” 8.5/10 (Prog Metal)
Tommy is the kind of musician who keeps pushing themselves to create music that should be considered “interesting” and based on this new album, and his previous effort Unrelaxed 2 (which I reviewed), he absolutely achieves this with an extensive blending of genres and a unique personal outlook on music. Buckle in, this is a…

Album Review: Crypts Of Despair – “All Light Swallowed” 8/10 (Death Metal)
Infectious death metal filled with powerful moments. There are great performances on the low end and the high end, often swinging between the two extremes with Cattle Decapitation like ramp-ups or Undergang style belched vocals. All-round good song writing that makes for a highly listenable record.

Album Review: Putrescine – “The Fading Flame” 8/10 (Death Metal)
A rip-roaring slab of antifascist aggression that combines a few of my favorite things: Death metal, Dark Souls and complete contempt for a world of unaccountable bastards and kings. And what better way to express that than hammering out some of the foulest Dark Souls lore with disorientating crushing riffage?

Album Review: Cannibal Corpse – “Violence Unimagined” 9/10 (Death Metal)
I am a weird kind of Cannibal Corpse fan, in that most fans will know more about the band as a whole than I do, but I’ve also spent half my life listening to Cannibal Corpse. However, I primarily listen to Bloodthirst and have for a long time. It’s exactly what I want from the…

Album Review: Portrayal Of Guilt – “We Are Always Alone” 8/10 (Blackened Hardcore)
A really good blackened hardcore release and no one specifically told me about it? I had to find it all on my own months after release? Christ, you guys are really letting it slip this year. The whole merging of black metal and hardcore variants like post-hardcore or screamo has had a huge come up…

Album Review: Pupil Slicer – “Mirrors” 9/10 (Hardcore)
It’s been a quiet start to the year as far as hardcore goes and Pupil Slicer are one of the first big albums to drop on my radar. Everyone’s talking about this one, so who the fuck am I to not check it out? I knew I’d be hooked as soon as the music slowed…

Album Review: Breaths – “Lined In Silver” 8/10 (Post Metal)
Lined In Silver is simultaneously familiar sounding and also filled with intrigue. Disband your expectations and let the album unfold because it does not persist as it initially presents, which is something much closer to Deftones. It’s a comforting album that I play regularly, there are great storytelling instrumentals narrated by a very capable vocalist…

Album Review: The Amenta – “Revelator” 9/10 (Avant Garde)
The pre-release promotion on this one was immense and filled with curious dark aesthetic, so am I quite excited to delve into this return LP, the Revelator from Australian big boys The Amenta. They did a promotional thing that is right up there on my list of favorite things bands have done, they gave away…

Album Review: Pipe Dreamer – “No Solace For The Soulless” 8/10 (Post Metal)
Alright! Time for some real underground post-metal shit. I forgot that music can have a rawer mix and still sound good. Pipe Dreamer has really played into the sound they have rather than trying to strive for something unrealistic. The result is something special blending charm with ruggedness.

Album Review: The Scalar Process – “Coagulative Matter” 7/10 (Tech Death)
There’s so much room in this bad boy. Some albums you put on and demand entertainment every second from, and then albums like this one that you can just put on and expect it to fill the room. You won’t always be aware of everything going on, you’ll daze in and out of the majesty…

Album Review: Scarred – “Scarred” 9/10 (Tech Metal)
I knew based on the psychedelic but modern album art this would be an interesting one, digging the aesthetic right off the bat with sounds akin to an old cassette being worn out and playing warped audio. Scarred brings extra noises to their tracks just to make them pop a little more, whether it’s an…

Album Review: Cult Of Luna – “The Raging River” 8.5/10 (Post Metal)
Where most other post-metal legends have fallen or stopped short, Cult Of Luna remains to bring out new albums every couple of years. They managed to remain relevant well into the 2010s with their Julie Christmas collab on Mainer in 2016, then right before the new decade in 2019 they came out with A Dawn…

Album Review: Fractal Generator – “Macrocosmos” 7.5/10 (Tech Death)
I know that opening sample orb-like sound, for sure. It’s either from an Elder Scrolls game or STALKER game, or maybe I’m plain wrong but what is supposed to be THE fractal generator is definitely a sound I’m familiar with. Or maybe this band really does make music about software for fractal pattern processing. Whatever…

Microdose: New Splits Volume 1
Splitmania! It’s time to review some new splits coming out and recently released that have caught my eye and to showcase the bands on either side. A lot of experimental music, which is the best use of a split if you ask me. Delve in and explore the bands that make each side special.

Album Review: Stortregn – “Impermanence” 9/10 (Black/Death)
This year is starting strong for melodic death metal and Stortregn have brought us a cheese-free adventure with their new album Impermanence. Can The Artisan Era label do any wrong? I haven’t heard a single bad album from them in the last year or two and this is a fine release for their catalogue. Tuck…

Album Review: Humanity’s Last Breath – “Välde” 9.2/10 (Technical Deathcore)
Humanity’s Last Breath made a big impression over here with their heavy as balls sound in 2019’s Abyssal, now they’re back on the radar with some innovations to show off. This album uses a lot of sound design to create a more unique approach to blackened deathcore that utilizes every instrumental technique available and even…

Microdose: Svn Seeker, Crypticus, Dreamwell, Settle For Shadows, Scythian Fate & AntiMozdeBeast
What are Twitter mutual’s in this context? A lot of bands follow me, but a lot of cool people who are in bands also follow me and these people are either very supportive or talkative, but I’m so daft I barely realise they’re in a band a lot of the time. So every now and…

Album Review: Dead Exaltation – “Despondent” 8.5/10 (Death Metal)
A death metal album with an unexpected amount of melody, it doesn’t even present as melodeath, it’s far closer to straight slapping brutal death metal that occasionally shifts the tempo down into a straight up clean guitar serenade as if I somehow accidentally listened outside the album or the musicians forgot the set list. It…

Album Review: Undergang – “Aldrig i livet” 9.4/10 (Death Metal)
Fun. A lot of fun. There’s something Undergang does in their writing that draws you into it with all of your enthusiasm. Some parts of this had me moving like the metal version of those goth kids dancing at the underpass or the wacky waving inflatable tube man. On the other hand, they managed a…

Album Review: Depravity – “Grand Malevolence” 9/10 (Death Metal)
Grand Malevolence is the death metal album I’ve been waiting for this year. Many have come and gone, some solid albums but even with Necrot and Ulcerate releasing huge albums I was still reserving my fandom for something specific and until now, undefined. It’s a big boy, with many five minute songs making up forty-nine…

Album Review: Ewigkeit – “23” 7/10 (Stoner/Prog)
A lot of fun right here, well, it’s short due to being an EP but what’s there is a very fun stoner love letter to the 70s. The thing that really ties it together for me, is the fact that it’s themed around my favorite books of all time, the Illuminatis! Trilogy. I’m used to…

HATEBREED Announce Eighth Album Weight Of The False Self Nov 27th
Welcome to the ongoing series of articles called #EliranWatch2020 because when I see an album cover by Eliran Kantor, I write about it somewhere.

SPIRIT ADRIFT release new single “Astral Levitation”, off of new album “Enlightened In Eternity”, out October 16th
Here’s the details and a taste of the upcoming Spirit Adrift album, following their 2019 underground hit Divided By Darkness which caught the attention of many metalheads with it’s classic stylistic artwork by Joe Petagno. Newcomers prepared to be warmed by the classic Heavy Metal sound wrought with modern tones. There’s also details surrounding a…

Album Review: Sleepscultper – Sleepscultper 9 (Math/Hardcore)
I took a second listen today just to make sure what I heard is what I heard, and fair enough the very opening seconds shot right down the back of my neck and down the spine. This appears to be a vinyl re-release combining their EP and debut LP, put out by Silent Pendulum Records…

Switch Review: Pokemon Sword 4/10
If you’re a 30 year old gamer boy like I am then you’ve probably played every generation of Pokemon from Blue & Red to Black & White, very much like myself. We spent months playing a single game as a child, binged them in weekends as a teen and as adults we still revisit some…

Album Review: Intercepting Pattern – The Encounter 8.5 (Jazz Metal)
People may be apprehensive when seeing jazz in the genre descriptor for a metal album but Intercepting Pattern manages to overcome many of the failings typical to this style. At first you may suspect it is an instrumental album which is very common for jazzy metal – fortunately there are great vocals on this album…

Microdose: Cryptic Shift, Drainbow, Firelink & Bog Wizard
Four new albums, four short reviews. Did you like all four of these? Then let me know in the comments!

Album Review: Karmacipher – “Introspectrum” 7/10 (Death Doom)
Atmospheric death metal is more accurate than death doom but you’ll hear the similarities to bands like Mortiferum or Void Rot. There’s a dirge as well as dissonance but Karmacipher have much more of a theatrical element. I’d consider it mildly technical. It’s a good album to put on if you have a decent speaker…
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Carcassbomb
noobheavyau@gmail.com
Australian. Owner of Noob Heavy, writer at Toilet Ov Hell, Podcaster and PR person. Studying a Bachelor of Fine Arts (Creative and Professional Writing). I can be a real grumbly mother fucker and I can be entirely supportive depending on the day, either way I tweet too much. Noob Heavy Radio is one of my favorite projects, It’s insane the interviews I’ve been able to do in 2020 like Jonas from Katatonia, Trevor from The Black Dahlia Murder and Schmier from Destruction. I also got to do a written interview with none other than Tommy Giles from Between The Buried And Me. Massive brags but fuck you, this is literally my page on my website on my computer in my room. I also have a lot of metal cassettes in here. Oh and I play guitar but not cool enough to join a band and not good enough to learn how to use Reaper properly.